Author: admin

A man ordered a voice automated robot car that does anything he tells it to do correctly without any error. He got the car and became very proud of what the car could do without mistakes. One day, he was home and his wife told him to tell the car to go and pick the…

Once, in a remote African village, a native man walked up to a missionary with a look of fury on his face. “My wife gave birth today,” the native said angrily, “and the baby is white! And you’re the only white person we’ve ever seen in this village!” The missionary glanced around guiltily for a…

A little guy gets on a plane and sits by the window. A few minutes later, a big, heavy, strong mean-looking, hulking guy plops down in the seat next to him and immediately falls asleep. The little guy starts to feel a little airsick, but he’s afraid to wake the big guy up to ask…

A young college student had stayed up all night studying for his zoology test the next day. As he entered the classroom, he saw ten stands with ten birds on them. Each bird had a sack over its head; only the legs were showing. He sat right in the front row because he wanted to…

A guy walks into a pub and sees a sign hanging over the bar which reads: “Cheese Sandwich: $1.50; Chicken Sandwich: $2.50; Hand Job: $10.00.” Checking his wallet for the necessary payment, he walks up to the bar and beckons to one of the three exceptionally attractive blondes serving drinks to an eager-looking group of…

A young man named John received a parrot as a gift. The parrot had a bad attitude and an even worse vocabulary. Every word out of the bird’s mouth was rude, obnoxious and laced with profanity. John tried and tried to change the bird’s attitude by consistently saying only polite words, playing soft music and…

An old lady was on the checkout at the local supermarket when a young female cashier approached her. The cashier looked at her arrogantly and told her that she ought to bring her own grocery bags next time, saying “plastic bags aren’t green and you are hurting the planet.” We didn’t have the green thing…

Bernie had a fight with Rachel, his wife, and went to the movies to cool off. Later that evening, he decided to phone home to see what the situation was and maybe even apologise. “Hello, darling,” he said, “what are you making for dinner?” “What am I making for dinner? After all the horrible things…

A wise old gentleman retired and purchased a modest home near a junior high school. He spent the first few weeks of his retirement in peace and contentment. Then a new school year began. The very next afternoon three young boys, full of youthful, after-school enthusiasm, came down his street, beating merrily on every trash…

The day finally arrives: Forrest Gump dies and goes to heaven. He is met at the Pearly Gates by St. Peter himself. The gates are closed however, as Forrest approaches the gatekeeper. St. Peter says, “Well Forrest, it’s certainly good to see you. We have heard a lot about you. I must inform you that…