A man arrives home early from work one afternoon to find<\/p>\n
his wife sprawled out on the bed, gasping and panting.<\/p>\n
\u201cWhat are you doing?\u201d he asks.<\/p>\n
\u201cErr,\u201d she stutters. \u201cI\u2026 um\u2026 I think I\u2019m having a heart attack!\u201d \u201cOh,\u201d <\/p>\n
exclaims the gullible husband, \u201cquick, I\u2019ll call an ambulance!\u201d He rushes <\/p>\n
downstairs, grabs the phone, and starts dialing 911. Suddenly, his son Johnny <\/p>\n
appears, sobbing his little heart out. \u201cWhat\u2019s wrong, son?\u201d the father asks.<\/p>\n
\u201cUncle James is in the closet with no clothes on, Daddy,\u201d the tearful toddler replies.<\/p>\n
Furious, the man bolts back upstairs, yanks open the wardrobe, and finds<\/p>\n
his brother standing there, completely naked, just as his son had said.<\/p>\n
\u201cYou bastard, Jim,\u201d the man yells. \u201cMy wife is over there having <\/p>\n
a heart attack and you\u2019re running around naked scaring Johnny!\u201d<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
A man arrives home early from work one afternoon to find his wife sprawled out on the bed, gasping and panting. \u201cWhat are you doing?\u201d he asks. \u201cErr,\u201d she stutters. \u201cI\u2026 um\u2026 I think I\u2019m having a heart attack!\u201d \u201cOh,\u201d exclaims the gullible husband, \u201cquick, I\u2019ll call an ambulance!\u201d He rushes downstairs, grabs the phone, […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":18947,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-18946","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","hentry","category-uncategorized"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/topnewsin34.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18946","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/topnewsin34.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/topnewsin34.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/topnewsin34.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/topnewsin34.info\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=18946"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/topnewsin34.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18946\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":18948,"href":"https:\/\/topnewsin34.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/18946\/revisions\/18948"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/topnewsin34.info\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/18947"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/topnewsin34.info\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=18946"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/topnewsin34.info\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=18946"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/topnewsin34.info\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=18946"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}